Growing up a foot taller than nearly all of my peers I found myself to always be a little bit self-conscious. I never truly fit in with my age group and certainly never had an immense amount of confidence. It wasn’t until later in life that I really grew into my height and embraced the 6’3” gift that I was born with.
Recently a large group of us got dressed up to celebrate a birthday. Dressed up may not be quite the right term to describe the theme. Everything that was worn to the event must have been purchased or found second hand. For weeks prior, everyone began scouring shops and filling tickle trunks with outfits rather gaudy in nature. When the evening of the event fell upon on us and we gathered together dressed to the 9’s (or maybe 79’s) it dawned on me. “We are actually going to leave the house dressed like this! Out on the town! With “normal people”. The thought of this made me anxious. It was as if I was being brought back the memories of my school days where I stood out; didn’t quite fit in, had a societal flaw of sorts.
I stopped, took a deep breath and processed the situation at hand. Suddenly it became clear. It didn’t matter what people thought. I am different. We all are different (dressed different as a group) but each of us different beneath our ostentatious outfits also. Tonight we were going to have fun. It didn’t matter what anyone thought. If the clothes we were wearing bothered someone else then it was there loss. What we wore didn’t hurt anyone or have a malicious nature. It was just a goofy group out and about.
Somebody once told me that to get ahead I must fit in and stand out at the same time. These words resonate with me to this day. In my personal life I am your everyday small town girl. I have had a lot of neat experiences but nothing about me screams eccentric on the surface. It is only once you interact with me that you begin to peel back the layers and learn about me as an individual. Simultaneously while fitting in, my height allows me to stand out. I walk into a room and heads turn. I have grown accustom to the classic 1. Wide eye stare as in –“Wow that girl is tall!” 2. I watch the gawkers eyes fall to the floor to check out my footwear. 3. I smile inside as I watch their reaction to the fact that I in fact am not wearing heals and yes… I really am that tall. As mentioned before it took me years to become comfortable in my own skin. This is the way I am, and the way I always will be… providing I can fend off the development of a hunchback. There are few days that go by where I don’t get asked by a stranger how tall I am, but I am okay with that. I have finally embraced that this is my way of fitting in and standing out concurrently. Once I was able to embrace that this is who I am it was like shining a new light upon life.
This blast from the past, with my thoughts of being picked on in the schoolyard, made me realise how important it is for students to learn this idea. Knowing what I know now would have changed my interactions and experiences as a student in elementary and secondary school. So often in media we see what we are supposed to look like and “who” society wants us to be. But what fun would that be? Who wants to be the same as everyone else? Through media literacy and critical literacy we can get students’ thinking about themselves and others in a new light. Seeing students for their “sameness” rather than picking on them for their differences. Further, we should be recognizing those same differences as strengths and for their beauty. Thus we can begin working together as a community to enhance them in the classroom. Bullying is not a natural part of growing up! I will work inside and outside the school community to support students struggling with issues of bullying and work to make positive change.
Instead of the students feeling as though they need to change to fit in, or change to not be bullied, or change to be happy, I hope to share my story and help them see that being different will become their key to success.
“Why fit in when you were born to stand out?”
― Dr. Seuss
No comments:
Post a Comment